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Deep

from GODAWFUL CALMNESS by GFJF

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lyrics

There’s this solemn place where I hate to go
It’s filled with concrete and dirt
Buried some things no one has to know
Hoped I’d forget its location
For my own good

But late at night when I dream of our past
Sometimes I creep out of bed
And slowly sleepwalk to the shed
Wake up sweating, shovel in hand

I cannot keep my tired arms from digging
Sometimes I smash them sore just to feel safe
‘Cause I know you’re still breathing deep in that hole

I’m trying to forget from which shithole you came
I’m trying to forget your name and your face
I’m trying to forget all the hurt and the shame

But I still see you lying with a smile on your face
As you taunt me and haunt me and push me away
I can’t count the times I imagined you weren't born
You were not in my life
Your fucking parents never met

Yet I cannot keep my tired head from digging
Sometimes I smash it sore just to feel safe
‘Cause I know you’re still breathing deep in that hole

credits

from GODAWFUL CALMNESS, released February 25, 2015
Gijs Wilbrink - vocals, guitar & electric piano
Zoran Krecho - drums
Ilija Volkan - bass guitar
Damjan Pejčinoski - guitar
Arja Mari - piano
Gijs Pronk - electric organ
Tim Meijer - cello

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